Life Moves Pretty Fast - But You Can Make Choices That Slow it Down

Even though we have the same twenty-four hours in each day that people have had since the earth started turning, we speak as though time is moving faster than it used to.  People say they don't have time for things (which is nonsense, you use the time for what you want to do).  People talk about the year going by quickly.  I know when November 1st arrived, I was thinking, "Hey, I just got used to it being September."

I have three theories about why modern time seems to move faster, even though it clearly doesn't.
1.  We are trying to get to so many places in every 24 hour period that we perceive time differently because we aren't stopping between activities.
2.  We are processing the constant stream of incoming data so often that we never reflect on it and incorporate into our being.  This all input all the time brain processing leads to the feeling of speed.
3.  Technological changes are happening at an unprecedented rate, and we feel the need to keep up.

Let me address each of these separately and give you some advice (you can decide if it is worth taking).


1.  You think you need to do everything, and you don't.  You think your kids need to do everything, and they don't.  I get it.  You don't want to miss out on an opportunity for an experience.  If you'll reflect for a moment, you may realize that by trying to take advantage of all the opportunities, you are actually missing out on all of the experiences.  You may be physically at a ballgame, but you are mentally planning your route to a movie or concert that night.  While you are the concert, you are mentally packing for the conference you are about to attend.  While you are the conference, you are thinking about the barbecue this weekend.  You have not experienced the ballgame, the concert, or the conference, and you probably aren't going to experience the barbecue either.  By trying to participate in everything, you experience nothing.  Consider the words of the great 80's philosopher Ferris Bueller, who said, "Life moves pretty fast.  If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

This fear is amplified all the more when you add the pressure of being a parent and wanting to make sure your kids experience everything.  Listen to someone who has spent the past two decades teaching teenagers.  You aren't giving them more opportunities; you are giving them more stress.  We all know this and do it anyway.  Stop it.  You are creating anxiety for them by being anxious yourself, which then only adds two more appointments to your week because now you both need therapy.   Pick one or two things, and then fully enjoy them.  You CAN make this choice.  You only think you can't.



2.  Put down the phone!  Put down the phone!  Put down the phone!  You can live without being in touch with the screen all the time.  I know this because I do not now, nor have I ever, owned a cell phone.  I'm not dead, so it can be done.  In fact, I would imagine my life is more peaceful as a result.  I'm only distracted by a screen when my laptop is open, and that is only happening in places where having it open makes sense.  I also close it when I am in meetings and feel that I am not listening.  This is possible.  The anxiety you feel by being disconnected from a screen will pass if you give it a few minutes.

I am not crazy enough to believe that everyone is going to make the choice I made, but you can make the choice to put it down for an hour.  I watch people scrolling through their phones at movies.  How much more stimulation does your brain need that you have to add to what Marvel or JJ Abrams or Disney is giving you?  I watch people scroll at church, and I'm pretty sure it is interfering with their worship because it is interfering with mine.  I watch people scroll in restaurants, parks, ball games, concerts, and during conversations with loved ones.  I don't know what treasure you think you are going to find at the end of the scroll, but to an unconnected observer, it looks like you believe you can reach the end of the internet if you scroll long enough.

The upshot of all this scrolling is that you are only putting information in.  You are never allowing your brain to deal with the information you got.  There are some neurological problems with this.  You weren't designed for the massive input, never process, never rest the brain, more input cycle.  This disruption of normal brain activity leads to anxiety and exhaustion that we wouldn't feel if we were taking the time to reflect.  Trump is going to do what he is going to do whether you see the live stream of his press conference or not.  Missing out a Kardashian making news is a gift you should give yourself.  It really will be okay if you don't find out the moment a member of the royal family announces their pregnancy.

Instead of putting more input in your brain, put the phone down for an hour.  Breaking addictions is hard work, so maybe you can only handle ten minutes for right now.  Whatever time causes you a little anxiety, start with that.  Use that time to ask yourself some questions about the last thing you read.  Do I agree with what he just did?  Why or why not?  How does the thing I just learned about fit with my worldview, my faith, or my past experiences?  How am I better or worse reading the blog post I just read?  If you just told someone on Facebook that you are praying for them, put the phone down and actually do it.  Allowing your brain this time will decrease the impression you have that time is racing past you.  If you combine number 1 and 2 by putting your phone down while you are at an event, you'll actually experience the event.

3.  It's okay NOT to have the latest model.  I know the rest of this post has revealed me to be a Luddite.  That's fine because I live the life I want to live without the need for more.  It's pretty nice, actually, and you can implement it on a much smaller scale than I do.

Technology used to change pretty slowly.  Consider this.  There was a 50-year gap between the invention of the food storage can and the invention of the can opener.  It seems crazy to me that it took that long to realize the need for a better method than stabbing the can with a knife.  There were 56 years between the invention of the airplane and landing on the moon.  When I point out how incredibly fast that is, my students don't see it.  They can't figure out what was so difficult about JFK's challenge to land on the moon because they had nine whole years.  This is because they now have new products coming out 10-30 times per year.  In January, I stood in the school parking lot taking photos of the Super Blue Blood Moon with a digital camera.  The last time this phenomenon even occurred, photography hadn't yet been invented.  In my 13 years as yearbook teacher, I've gone through four different camera models (and that's progressing at a pretty slow rate because I am me).

As a high school teacher of upper-middle-class kids (many of whom have parents in the tech industry), I have constant exposure to the newest and latest tech.  The first Apple watch I ever saw was on the wrist of a student.  Because I see new products often, I see the rate at which new products are arriving on the market.  It's practically every week that there is a new model of something.  Apple and Samsung upgrade each product about once a year (but they space them out for maximum hype), and no student wants to have the "old" model.  They drop a fortune on new tech.  It's not just phones; there's the need to have the premium package of everything, from the best shoes to the latest watch to the multiple streaming services.  I still have the rabbit ears I used in college sitting on a tv I've had for 13 years, and I have no shortage of things to watch.

I know there is nothing we can do about the pace of technology, but we do have the choice of what to adopt.  It is okay to make the choice to keep your old model of iPad.  You'll spend far less money and have fewer bugs to work out if you stay a couple of generations behind.  Have the perspective to realize how fast that three-year-old model of computer is compared to the one you had before it instead of comparing it to the one that came out yesterday.  Tell yourself what one of my wise students wrote, "Sometimes, when I am impatient with a text not going through fast enough, I tell myself, 'It has to go to space and back.  You can calm down.'"

Time is not moving faster, and you can make these choices.  You can be an adult who makes decisions or allow the world to push you around.   Technology should make your life easier.  Don't let it bully you.