Positively Realistic

I fought the dryer, and the dryer won. I'm gutted. I really believed I could repair the broken belt. I found a YouTube video, and everything worked exactly like his until I got to putting the belt around the pulley.  I fought and and fought. I cut my thumb and had a massive bruise on one forearm and the other shoulder. I tried it with mom pressing on a crowbar to get the wheel into position. I tried tipping the machine on its back for easier access to the parts, but that just made it more difficult because the belt placement was no longer benefitted by gravity but rather falling behind the drum because of gravity. Tipping it over also meant that I had disconnected it from the vent, and you have to be a master yogi to fold yourself over to attach that and then climb out overtop of the dryer. (Note to the people who make these: Why do they need to be two inches from the floor? And can the tube be about six inches longer?) Anyway, after trying for weeks and using different methods, my mom stopped me while I was trapped in the space between the dryer and the wall and said, "Will you let us buy you a dryer." I said yes, but I hate that what should have been a $20 job became a replacement. I don't like admitting defeat. 

But, at some point, we all have to admit defeat. We have to recognize that there are things we cannot do. In spite of the messaging we got from children's television in the 80s and the proliferation of athletic clothing with Philippians 4:13 printed on it, we have limitations. It's part of our design as human beings. There are certain attributes that belong only to God. Omniscience, omnipotence, omnipresence and the like are not something we can achieve. We tried at the tower of Babel, and we seem to be trying again with AI, but no matter how far we advance technologically, we will remain limited.

Why am I talking about this on an education blog?  Well, partly because I needed to work through the hit to my pride from not being able to repair the dryer, but more importantly, we need to be realistic with students.

People who enter the education field tend to be idealistic. And, in an effort to support kids and their dreams, we get even more idealistic with them. That seems loving, but there reaches a point where it isn't. When we support things that cannot happen, we set kids up for disappointment and failure. There's a commercial on television where kids are asked what they want to be when they grow up. Most say doctors or lawyers, but one sweet little girls says she wants to be a unicorn. Now, she's about 4 in this commercial, so I think playing along with the understanding that it is make-believe is totally fine. But, as she gets older, telling her "if you can dream it, youe can be it" is not. 

It's totally fine to have dreams that are long shots. I'm not saying to crush the dreams of a kid whose ambition it to be a professional athlete. There are people who achieve that goal, and they were all at one point, children with a dream. I am saying that it is good to encourage that child to have a back up plan because the percentage of talented athletes that become professionals is small, and some of them sustain career ending injuries. People with back up plans are resilient. People without back up plans often wander aimlessly for years. 

My childhood dream was to pilot the space shuttle. I paid attention in math and science; I went to Space Camp; I somehow got my hands on an application for the Air Force Academy and started filling it out in the 4th grade. When I was 13, it became clear that this was not going to happen. First, I was taller than NASA's heigh limit (yes, at 13). Second, I have both eyesight and equilibrium issues.  While the eyesight could have been corrected, the balance and the height were insurmountable problems. Well meaning adults in my life told me not to give up on this dream. Some said, "You'll be so good that they'll change the height rules for you." Apparently, they didn't understand the constrictive nature of spacecraft. Several went as far as to say that God would not let me want something this much if it weren't His plan for me (Now, that's dangerous counsel if ever I heard it). Thankfully, I had other, more realistic, adults around me that said, "Well, you obviously love science. What kinds of jobs might allow you to use that?" I kicked around veterinary medicine, pharmaceuticals, and physical therapy until I walked into Mr. Barbara's physics class and decided I basically wanted to be him, a person who made people love subjects most were afraid of. After 25 years of science teaching, I achieved a lot of things, but my favorite was always when a kid came into the meet and greet saying that they didn't like science leave at the end of the year excited to learn more science.

I'm not advocating for pessimism. I'm not suggesting that negativity is best. I'm advocating for realism with a positive tone.  When a student shares their dream, you can be positive and say "What's your plan for making that happen?" As they tell you their plan, you can layer in nuances and back up plans without being a dream crusher. If a student has come to the realization that they can't be the thing they thought they could, be sympathetic. "I know how hard it must be to realize that, but you have a purpose. What did you love about . . .? How might you still have a job that utilizes that part?"  

Whether a glass is half empty or half full doesn't depend on your mindset. It depends on what direction you are pouring the water. If you are drinking from it, the last thing you did was remove water, so you made it half empty. If you are pouring water into it, the last thing you did was add water, so you made it half full.  Helping kids pour water back into their cup after a setback doesn't happen by being blindly positive. But it can happen by helping them find an achievable dream that still incorporates their "why" from their prior goals. It's both realistic and positive.

I don't believe in resolutions, but since it is January, let's make one. Let's resolve to be positively realistic with students.

Can vs. Should

This is America.  In spite of the assertions of some extreme right and left people, that means we are free to do a lot of things (I guess those people want to be free to do anything, but that's not how society works).  But just because we can do some things doesn't mean we should.  There should be something inside you that prevents you from doing and/or saying certain things.  That inhibiting factor might be religious regulations, ethnic culture, or how your parents raised you.  But if there is nothing in your heart that makes you pause and ask "Should I do this?" rather than "Can I do it?" it is not a sign that you were more free, just less ethical.

I'll give you an example.  In 2020, during the time of the public's reaction to the killing of George Floyd by a Minneapolis police officer, most of the protests were peaceful, but there were some that wrongly turned to violent riots involving property damage and danger to human life.  There is much to be discussed and analyzed in the response of many during this time, but what I found disheartening was that some of the people I love responded with glee that they could turn their attention to the riots, distracting themselves from the need to respond to the racism that sparked it all.  A friend of mine posted a meme with a very famous photograph of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor with the caption, "Democrats would call this a mostly peaceful day in Hawaii." I responded that I thought it was wrong to use this photo as a joke. Her first response was to explain it to me as though I didn't get it and then to tell me she had free speech as an American.  The first amendment does protect her from legal backlash, but it shouldn't prevent her from personal reflection.  There should have been something inside of her that said, "Maybe it isn't a great idea to use a powerful photograph from a horrific event in which American servicemen died to mock people."  Just because you can doesn't mean you should.  Another friend shared clearly doctored photographs to mock people with whom he disagreed.  When people pointed out that the photos were obviously not real, he responded in angry ways that he was allowed to post whatever he wanted (true) and it was funny, so they should get over it.  So, in his mind, spreading lies is fine as long he gets to mock someone he hates. I've had the same disheartening feelings this week as I've watched fellow Christians gleefully mock Joe Biden's age after his dismal debate performance.  Christian friends, remind yourself that one of the fruits of the Spirit is self control.  We could be having a serious discussion about the merits of these two men and the policies each would have and the impact those policies would have on the world, but instead, we've chosen a less humane route simply because it is more entertaining. Can you do it?  Obviously yes.  Should you?  Obviously no.

Examples of this concept abound.  I am generally a capitalist because I do believe that market competition usually leads to better products (not always, things are more complicated than that).  I also know that we are people with sin natures and anyone, left completely unchecked, will have temptations to do wrong.   A lot of people will justify immoral practices if they are not explicitly against the rules.  Therefore, some reasonable regulations are necessary.  In a great example of self restraint, author Vern Poythress applies his morals over socially acceptable rules.  He could make a lot more money than he does, but he has decided to forgo copyright on his own work by making it freely available online. He believes knowledge should be free to all.  Something in him compels him to choose, not just what he could do, but what he believes is the right thing to do.

There's no way to write this post without quoting one of the greatest characters ever put on screen.  Dr. Ian Malcolm, the chaos theorist portrayed by Jeff Goldblum in Jurrasic Park, warned park creator John Hammond about the end results of recreating extinct predators, saying, "your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.”  We're seeing this all over as technology advances at an unprecedented rate.  We worship  convenience on the altar of entertainment, so we have loaded app after app on our phones without pausing to reflect on whether they are good for us.  When we finally recognize the negative impact, the devices are already too ingrained in society to undo it.  In a move even George Orwell didn't predict, we have voluntarily brought devices into our homes that listen to us at all times.  Should we?  We never bother to ask ourselves.  It's more convenient, so we don't care.  

We are doing the same thing with the rapid expansion of AI.  Science fiction writers have spent decades warning us about the potential impact of allowing machines to learn and think for themselves.  Rather than heed those warnings, we are saying, "I can do something a little faster than before?  Yep. Let's move forward with it as quickly as possible."  I'm not just talking about students using it to cheat (which they absolutely will - some of the AI apps are marketing themselves as "never get caught.").  I'm not just talking about adults using it to get out of the hard work of thinking for themselves (Be careful.  AI flat out makes things up that don't exist, and you won't know if you aren't prepared to do the work to find out.). I'm talking about art forgery, deep fake videos, and inaccurate patient care.  These things are already happening.  AI is going to make us all a little less human, and it is going to make some of us a lot less human.  One day, we will look around and wonder how we got here.  But every time I say this, the response is, "Well, it's not going anywhere, so we have to accept reality."  Do we?  Can't we take some control over our own lives?  It doesn't have to be this way, but we care more about convenience than reflection.  I'm not saying we should not progress technologically; I'm saying it is worth slowing down to ask some questions before we proceed without limits.  Sadly, I don't see that happening.

You can't control what is available, but you can control what you adopt in your own life.  I resisted owning a cell phone until I was 47 and a half years old.  I wouldn't have one now if I hadn't been changing jobs.  I am, however, limiting my use of it.  I refuse to install social media apps or games onto it because I've seen what that does to people.  I use it for my job, and I text and make calls, but I will not make it a source of entertainment or use it to pay for things.  Your line and mine don't have to be the same, but you should take some times to figure out what your values are rather than using everything just because you can.