Credibility First

One of my favorite moments of each year happened this week.  A student asked a question, and, as I began to answer it, another student said, "How does she know all of this?"  Other students remind him that I am a teacher, to which he replies, "But she knows everything."  

Let me be clear.  I know a lot of things, but I do not know everything.  I make no attempt to convince students that I know everything.  In fact, I probably say, "I don't know" at least once a class period every day.  They tend to forget that, in part, because I often follow it up with, "but my best guess would be . . ." Rather than recognize that as educated speculation, they forget that I opened with the admission that I didn't actually know.  The reason it is one of my favorite moments isn't that it is good for my ego; it is because I know at that moment that I have established credibility with my class.

There are teachers everywhere who use the phrase "relationships are everything" on their social media and in their conversations and wax eloquent about how they spend the first two weeks just building relationships with their new students.  While I appreciate their intention, I always think about how creeped out I would have felt as a student if any of my teachers had spent the first two weeks trying to bond with me.  We don't expect that from other relationships or professions (with the possible exception of ministers).  When I go to a new doctor,  I first want him to have a medical degree from a good university.  While I want him to be professionally warm and have a good bedside manner, I don't want him to try to make friends with me.  If I needed a lawyer, I might appreciate a personable approach, but before that, I would want to know how many cases he has successfully tried and what kind of law he studied in school.  Relationships would not be "everything" to me; credibility would be.

Please understand that I am not saying the opposite is true.  I'm not saying that relationships are nothing.  I am simply saying that credibility comes first.  Only then do students have any reason to want a relationship with me.  Relationships follow credibility, so let's talk about how to build credibility.

1. Convey your credentials - In the same way, I would want to see a diploma on my doctor's or lawyer's office wall, I do the same thing in my classroom. My college diploma and my teaching certificate are both framed and hanging behind my desk.  I tell my students how many years I have taught the subject I am teaching them.  It may seem like you are bragging on yourself, but what you are really doing is making students comfortable that they are in the hands of someone who knows what they are doing.
2. Keep your word - You tell students a lot of things in the first few days of school.  It may be about rules or procedures or what you are going to put on their first test.  It is always important to keep your word, but it is especially vital during those first couple of weeks.  If you tell them a question is going to be on a quiz, make sure you put that question on that quiz.  If you tell them that something will happen if they don't follow a certain procedure, you have to follow through on that the first time it happens.  (That means you don't make empty threats or promises, so don't say things just to be dramatic.) If you introduce yourself to your students as a person whose word cannot be trusted, you will never get to the point of developing relationships.
3. Take your job seriously - Students can tell the difference between teachers who plan lessons intentionally and those who wing it every day.  They can tell the difference between teachers who grade with care and feedback and those who just give everyone an A (They may say they like the latter, but I've heard them talk about them behind their back. They don't respect them, and they certainly don't do any valuable work for them.) Students can tell the difference between a teacher who manages their classroom to ensure everyone can learn and those who let the class run wild (or conversely are on a power trip).  If you take your job seriously, students see that and respond to it. 
4. Show your enthusiasm - You chose teaching for a reason. It may have been purely that you loved kids or it may have been a love of learning or an excitement for your subject.  Show that to your students.  History was not naturally my favorite subject, but when I had a teacher who truly loved it, he inspired me to read books about Russian Czars (in 7th grade, no less).  And if you want to build relationships, showing enthusiasm is one of the best ways to do that.  People are drawn to those who enjoy things. I get emails from students during breaks, in which they share something they saw out in the wild that reminded them of something I taught them.  They only do that because they know I will be excited about it.

After you have earned credibility with your students, then they will be more naturally inclined to want a relationship with you.  It won't be creepy that you are asking them questions about their lives if they trust you as their teacher.